* This post-abortive testimony was submitted to not-a-victim in hope that it may be used of the Lord to help other post-abortive women articulate their sin Biblically and come to repentance and faith in Christ Jesus. In the wake of her own personal sin against her baby, Sonya now works tirelessly to see abortion made illegal and criminalized.
I am humbled to share with you tonight as a repentant murderer, by abortion, redeemed by the Lord Jesus Christ.
I was a teenager with a positive pregnancy test and I knew I was with child. I listened to the school counselor, the child’s father, those employed in murder for hire in the name of healthcare, and many others conspiring with me to slay the innocent. I suppressed the truth in unrighteousness and staggered to the slaughter with blood money in hand. I lied still, staring at the ceiling, while a high-powered vacuum was used to suck, by blood and parts, the life of my child into a canister and disposed of as ‘medical waste’. My child was unjustly delivered to death at my will, as the mother, the only one the law permits to give consent to a preborn child’s death.
The only victim that day was my child.
The victim of a culture at peace with child sacrifice. Victim of the one who was by design to nurture, protect and love that child regardless of the circumstances. There was no do over.
I will never forget that day.
But God saved me and called me to a holy calling not because of my own works but by His great mercy to me and because of His own purpose and grace, which He gave me in Christ Jesus before the ages began. I no longer live for myself but for the One who loved me and died for me to set me free from the penalty and power of sin to live a righteous and holy life.
Although I know the Savior Who forgives repentant sinners, yes even murderers, repentance did not absolve me from justice and penalties as an evil doer before the state. Nor did it remove the consequences that I experience resulting from sin.
As I became involved in the Pro-Life movement early in my new life in Christ, I believed the goal was to end abortion.
Yet over the years, I began to realize something was seriously amiss and in 2007 I learned that the federal partial birth abortion ban didn’t actually stop partial birth abortion. Instead, abortionists were simply being trained to inject babies with a drug to stop their heartbeat to prevent a live birth and prosecution under the ban.
I remember thinking at the time how is this happening? Is there nothing that can be done to stop it?
Ten years later, I watched the Pro-Life movement reject a bill to abolish abortion to promote instead a dismemberment ban.
A dismemberment ban sounds good on the surface but I had learned by this time to look closer at Pro-Life bills. I had repented of Pro-Life and had become an abolitionist. I had pledged in my heart to no longer support ANY Pro-Life politician or group that refuses to treat abortion as God’s justice demands according to His word.
I discovered the sponsor’s statement of intent on the dismemberment ban bill said, “…dismemberment may be used as long as the unborn child’s heart has stopped beating PRIOR to dismembering.”
I recall thinking, did I read that right? I even called someone to verify it. The Pro-Life defense in court was that the ban would require one thing and one thing only… a “HUMANE TERMINATION” of the child. But the bill was struck down as an undue medical burden to women.
Yet, politicians received 100% Pro-Life endorsements from Pro-Life groups for their action on this bill.
As I pondered this in light of God’s word, I thought Do you suppose, O Pro Life establishment leaders and legislators—you who judge those (abortionists) who practice such things and yet do them yourself (requiring a ‘HUMANE TERMINATION’ of the preborn child)—that you will escape the judgment of God? Or do you presume on the riches of his kindness and forbearance and patience, not knowing that God’s kindness is meant to lead you to repentance (to change your mind and inner man to accept God’s will)?
By stark contrast in 2016 Senator Silk of Oklahoma COURAGEOUSLY brought forth a historic, first bill of abolition — SB1118. I was here to see it and rejoiced in the truth!
As a recipient of God’s amazing grace, I believe in God’s mercy ministry with those who repent of their sin of abortion.
Yet, I longed to see this hemorrhage of injustice stopped at the source not to just keep dealing with the fallout.
I wholeheartedly stand with Senator Silk in support of SB13 as he obeys God’s ordained duty to wield the sword in punishing evil doing. By God’s grace, I will continue to stand with all who will REPENT WITH US and fight under the banner of King Jesus until abortion is abolished to the glory of God! Amen.